Courtney In Belize on 'The Bachelor' - A Snarky & Quick Recap

It's another week of The Bachelor, or, Courtney's sound-bytes while The Bachelor airs on ABC.  And this week, Ben is a mere week away from the infamous hometown dates, which are the precursor to the "overnight bang suite!"

An early quote from the episode from Emily was precious... "Courtney likes to sleep a lot, wake up and bite.  Goes back to sleep."

Lindzi gets the first date and here comes the waterworks from the other girls.  Wah!  They take a helicopter ride to a deep blue hole and jump in from the helicopter.

Later that night, she "can't take her eyes off of Ben."  Because he makes her feel all fuzzy inside.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch ....  we get to listen to Courtney whine about not having gone on a one on one date.  Puffy upper lip complainin'.

Emily gets the next one-on-one, and the girl (Courtney) that manipulates Ben's time on the other girls' time, says it's not fair Emily gets the date.
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Emily has the next turn at Ben... I mean date.  She says she's ready to fall in love... (but shouldn't she already be falling in love?)  Then they go diving to kill an innocent lobster.  Ah, another bikini opportunity from ABC!  And when they catch their victim, we get romantic music as a prelude to the steaming death of an innocent crustacean.

Courtney is upset Ben is out with someone else, or as she puts it, someone who treated her so bad.

Did Courtney just say she won't be accepting a rose later because of who Ben is seeing?  There was noise in the house while puffy upper lip was grumbling.  Dang it!

And like all the other girls, Ben says this girl could be the one.  Aren't they all Ben?  I mean, you are The Bachelor, and I'm guessing,  using the proper cue cards on each date.

Now Emily thinks she's falling in love with Ben... but it's the social isolation kids!  You'll get over it!

Courtney gets the next one-on-one date and turns all bipolar and gets happy...  but sometimes it's hard to read her.  She has the same expression, period.  Then she rubs it in everyone elses face.

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As Courtney is walking away from the villa of women for her own date, she mutters, "Can't stand you all..." back at the girls.  Wow, the class just oozes off her puffy upper lip.

{So tell me, is ABC like spending 1/2 the show focusing on this train wreck of a human???  It seems that way.}

So she calls Ben out on why he chose Emily for a one-on-one date and other matters of the vain heart.  She even dares to suggest she's thinking of not accepting a rose this week.  Yea... right!

WOW!  WOW!!! Did I just hear that? When Ben mentions the other women, Courtney says she's tried to make friends with them but that  they're very into themselves.  She JUST described herself!

I was stunned.  I used to work with people like that!  LOL.

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The group date, Ben shows up at 4am and wakes the sleeping beasts.  Seriously dude, You. Do. Not. Wake. A. Woman. Up. Before. The. Makeup. Is. On!!!!

Ben is going to take girls shark swimming.  (Where's Courtney???)

Rachel has a huge trauma about the sharks and monopolized Ben, in what looks like the entire group date.  But sanity prevails and Casey B. gets the rose at the end of the date.

In one of the hundreds of voice-overs, Courtney is saying how all the girls are caddy.  (Dudette, seriously?)

Then the girls say they care about Ben and hint around that there's something up.  Ben asks, and the girls, as a group, set her under the bus.  And rightously so!  FINALLY!

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Ben cut the evening Bachelor cocktail party a bit short because he knows who and what needs to happen... then we get another sanctimonious sound-byte of Courtney disrespecting the other girls.

Three roses to be handed out and the tension is THICK in Belize!  But then he asks Courtney aside first to ask her a few things.

Then he gives a rose to Nikki, Lindzi, AND Courtney, much to the chagrin of the world.  Dude & Dudettes, is this guy for real?

And thus, another week of The Bachelor has come and gone.  And the fun is only just beginning.